Tuesday, January 26

Disclaimer

After a very recent conversation with a friend (thanks Jan), I realized that the nerd in me only thought of the definitions for the word 'salty' while creating this blog.

Please note, then, that I (maybe unfortunately) did not consider any colloquialisms when deciding to name my blog as such.

Thank you and I hope you keep reading!
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What it is to be salty.

My last name is of German origin, likely hacked short by some John Smith at Ellis Island. A monosyllabic word, it is often confused with 'salt,' which naturally has become my nickname to some.

I find it amusing that my personality so closely matches that of the definition for "salty."
salty (n) - piquant; sharp; witty; racy; coarse; earthy
(Piquant is defined as "agreeably stimulating, interesting, or attractive," of which I am all, and "of an interestingly provocative or lively character.")

Those who know me would agree that I exude salty humor. With this blog, I will illustrate just that, by communicating interesting happenings or occurrences in my life, and reporting any and all noteworthy observations I may make, sarcasm abound.

I share the comedic values and vision of Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld, two people who embody salty and also find humor in the least likely of places. Wit is my defense mechanism both for coping with the idiocy of, and adding to the vibrancy of the world around me. I find some things hilarious that others may deem inappropriate. Or, maybe it's just that I have a humorous way of looking at the workings of life itself.

A few things about me in no particular order:
I'm a Jersey City-born-and-raised Italian-American (disclaimer: what you have seen on MTV's Jersey Shore is indeed an accurate representation of guidos who frequent Seaside Heights, NJ, but is not by any means a platform to evaluate all New Jersey residents or Italians for that matter);

I distrust capitalism;

I loathe ignorance;

I want every driver everywhere to use turn signals while switching lanes or making a turn;

I have great hair, and I know it, and so does everyone else;

I have a magnetic personality that I wish would sometimes work in reverse to repel undesirables;

I love to read and am a nerd with a vast vocabulary thanks to it;

I appreciate creativity and intelligence, and any (healthy) means by which a person may cultivate and enhance their own;

I am a Deadhead-tie-dyed-bandana-wearing hippie who digs all rock-and-roll and groovy beats;

I support herbal remedy;

I have a well-developed palette that enjoys great food;

I love the beach and the ocean and seashells and vacations;

I want to travel the world;

I would prefer to wear sneakers everywhere for every occasion;

I support sitcoms and feel that reality television is the ruination of mankind;

I am a lover and a fighter and a writer, and I always stand up for what I believe.

Thank you dictionary.com for your assistance today.
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